I do agree with the points of the post, I just wanted to point out some positives.

Steroids are bad right? Not really, if you know how to use it properly without mixing alcohol and other drugs with it.

If things were just handed to us and it was fool proof, then it would be one predictable and boring life.

These things are simply tools and you can use it to your advantage or not.

But you definitely make great points. She is acting childish and I don’t take offense to that, I think when something is this serious and someone is so naive and dumb, there’s no being nice to them, just gotta tell it how it is.

That is at least how my friend was with me to make me realize the situation I was in.

I will check out the two links you provided, thanks.

Also, one of the worst things parents can do is try to shield your from the real world and then when things start to happen, it shocks you so much more. I know this is how my parents are and its where i got my bad habits with money from plus my naive mindset that the world is a place full of happy and caring people. Hence why i say parents shield us form the reality, which in the long run is really bad for us.

that situation is incredibly serious. I can’t believe she said that her uncle won’t kick her out. As you say that is the point when you know you can’t help someone.

Forgive me if this is offensive but it’s almost like she’s regressed to a child-like state. I know we can all have our moments but I fear this is just going to get worse for her. She’s gone back home when things have gotten tough (which is fair enough because family is the greatest support) but she’s not taking charge of the situation. She could be benefitting so much from the opportunity her uncle has given her.

What you mentioned about emotional attachment is so key. The Simple Dollar always writes articles about how we live in a world where we believe money can replace love. (Not in these exact words but through buying things we try to fill a void). I also think that money is a really taboo situation and this needs to change. Okay we all know you don’t ask what your friends earn (unless you want advice on getting a raise and what’s a reasonable amount to ask – basically when it’s relevant) but women talk so openly about love and relationships that I wish the same attitude was adopted to money.

I think money as a taboo subject of discussion needs to be abolished. It all starts at home. My parents (especially my dad) were never afraid to tell us the financial situation as it was. When he was unemployed we were told, when he lost £150 (in the 90s) we were told and I always knew what my parents earned and still do. Some may say this takes away the innocence in childhood but the reason that life is so hard is that we are shielded from the cold and hard realities of life for most of our childhood and teen years.

And then the next time she talks to me I start to ask her how shes doing with the money situation, and telling her she should be concerned because her uncle is not just gonna let her stay there for free. Her excuse was its my uncle so he won’t kick me out.

I mean that right there shows that she is not really pressured to meet her monthly obligations for rent and bills.

Also, what really ticked me off was that when i was asking her this stuff, she basically told me she does not feel like discussing it now.
So i ended with telling her, are you doing to feel like discuss it when you lose your car and are about to live on the street.

So that situation right there shows you people will complain and whine but they won’t really do much about it.

I don’t understand, maybe it is the emotional attachment they have towards money that its so hard to talk about.

We are bombarded with advertisements and sometimes we don’t even realize it!

I think what’s difficult, like all ‘addictions’ or bad habits, is to recognize you have a problem.

From personal experience I’ve seen people with jokey Facebook statuses ‘boasting’ about the latest iPod they’ve bought or how they’ve spent half of their loan (3 days after receiving it). It’s almost banter but it’s quite serious if you really think about it. I don’t get why people think it’s cool to spend and brag? Fair enough if you can afford it but is life that inadequate that you can only achieve anything with money??

This culture of spending money that isn’t ours (especially as students) is worrying but too difficult to control. I also think you cannot tell a person what to do. If anything it makes things worse as they actively want to rebel to prove their point.

Some people have come to me to receive help their financial situation but when it came down to crunching numbers and creating a budget they got bored and said “I don’t think I really need to do it.” I really don’t know how to motivate people to take charge.

A lot think that by spending a lot they are powerful and in control but it’s completely vice-versa. If you have control you will never be a slave to your money (or your boss!).

The point is to become strong as a person and learn to think for yourself and distinguish what is good and bad.

In the end it is your fault for buying that item.

Roger, you make a great point about not knowing the true cost of debt.

Overall, you can use cash or credit but it is all about personal preference.
Carrying cash is a hassle and risky while credit cards is also risky because it is so easy to use.
So you need to learn to control your spending first. The method is just a tool.

These people feel entitled to do ___ and if they can’t pay in cash it doesn’t stem that feeling. Since they are entitled to it, it winds up on credit.

Our generation is known for that in a lot of regards (entitlement), unfortunately.