“I’m staying in to focus on my finances.”
A friend told me this once. Enjoy being a loser. You can still go out and get ahead with your finances. You don’t have to give up on all things fun just to have a few bucks in your bank account.
Everything that you’ve been told about going out by personal finance experts is wrong.
I’m tired of personal finance experts writing USELESS articles about how you can save money by refilling your water bottle and never going out again. I get it, if you go out it’s going to cost money. You know what’s worse? Watching the whole world pass you by as you sit around.
“Enjoy life. There’s plenty of time to be dead.” — Hans Christian Andersen
I had to write an article to debunk this myth about how you should never go out if you want to get ahead financially.
Too many personal finance writers are dorks. They write about what they know. These people don’t know what it’s like to have their phone go off on a Friday night. They think it’s okay to stay in to lecture about how you should never go out.
It’s easy to stay in when you never get invited anywhere.
What happens when you actually have friends and want to do things? This is why most young people hate personal finance. They read some article that’s more like a sermon about why going out is bad for you and then they give up on money management.
Would you follow advice from someone who tells you that going out is bad for you? No.
Would you accept advice that’s all about not doing anything fun? Absolutely not.
I’m here to change all of that. Everything you’ve been told about going out in personal finance articles is wrong and stupid.
Why’s it okay to go out even when you want to save money?
“I’ve come to believe that connecting is one of the most important business—and life—skill sets you’ll ever learn. Why? Because, flat out, people do business with people they know and like. Careers—in every imaginable field—work the same” — Keith Ferrazzi
I’ve quoted Keith Ferrazzi a few times in here because his book, Never Eat Alone, was one of the five books that changed my life. The book opened my eyes to networking and actually making friends without being an annoying weirdo who talks about “fostering relationships.”
Side note: don’t email people to “network.” That sounds weird.
Life happens outside of your four walls. Why would you want to spend your entire life sitting around as the world passes you by? Dumb question.
Why should you go out?
Successful people in your field go out.
Do you think your successful friends are staring at the computer screen in their mom’s basement? Do you think that successful people scoff at the idea of letting loose a little?
Look no further than Instagram. The most successful people are usually out there doing exciting things or just enjoying life. They’re not ranting and raving about how they stayed in to save $12 or how going to the movies once a month will put you into debt.
Successful people go out and they interact with other successful people.
People work with people they like.
“That person got the promotion because the boss likes them.”
A friend told me this with a straight face.
DUH!
Why else do you think they got promoted? The boss likes them. That’s life. Would you promote someone who you didn’t get along with?
The same friend was offended when his manager wouldn’t give him a reference. People don’t generally give references to those that are rude to them.
We all want to work with people that we like when all things are equal (assuming the quality of actual work is relatively similar).
You suck at social interactions.
“I’m in this alone.”
A friend ranted to me about how he didn’t need anyone. No, you’re not in this alone. Shut up. We all need each other.
You have to figure out how to deal with people if you want to get ahead. You have to be able to make small talk and to get people to like you enough to put up with you.
I’m not saying that I’m perfect at this, but I’m always working on it. I’ve made it a point the last few years to go out often and to put myself out of my comfort zone so that I could improve my social skills.
You have to learn how to flirt, how to make friends, and how to be professional. It’s not easy. I’ve said embarrassing things at the worst possible times. I’ve been unprofessional when I shouldn’t have been. It happens. Get out there and get better at social interactions. Learn to make small talk. Get into the habit of telling stories. Make people laugh.
“The mark of a good conversationalist is not that you can talk a lot. The mark is that you can get others to talk a lot. Thus, good schmoozer’s are good listeners, not good talkers.” — Guy Kawasaki
There are other ways to save money.
I barely talk about saving money anymore because once you apply our systems, money management goes on auto-pilot.
What are these systems?
- Cancun Technique. I show you exactly how to find the motivation to save money right now.
- Houdini System. This is what I do to prevent myself from spending all of my money.
- YOLO System. Here I share how to spend money without feeling guilty about it.
Follow these and you’re set. You don’t have to stress about spending a few bucks on a drink. You don’t need to share quotes about how focused you are. You don’t have to think about personal finance 24/7.
You have to always focus on making more money.
Imagine you have two options:
- Work a little harder to make money through freelancing during the week so that you can have more fun on the weekends.
- Stay in and do nothing because you’re proud of saving $30 by missing your friend’s birthday.
Which option would you choose? Read up on how to make more money so that you don’t have to limit yourself. I personally don’t like to live with limits.
You don’t have to spend a fortune on going out.
I can’t stay at home unless I’m hosting guests. I also don’t like to spend money frivolously. The truth is that you don’t have to go crazy whenever you go out. You don’t have to go to wild clubs or festivals either.
What are fun things you can do?
I’ll just share with you what I’ve doing in 2017:
- Axe throwing.
- Archery tag.
- Sporting events (soccer, hockey, baseball).
- Comedy club.
- Trampoline park.
- Medieval times event.
There are many other social things that you can do without spending a ton of money.
That’s why it’s okay to go out and have an active social life even when you want to move forward in life.
How can you go out without going broke and feeling guilty?
“It’s the friends you can call up at 4 a.m that matter.” — Marlene Dietrich
Get your finances in order.
Okay, you can’t go out if you’re flat broke. You also shouldn’t rack up with $400 bar tab when you’re in debt. For the sake of this article, I’m going to assume that you’ve read through Studenomics and are intelligent enough to know this kind of stuff. I’m also going to assume that you’re trying to work on your money and that going out on a Saturday night won’t ruin your life.
Get your finances in order right now. You don’t want to have to feel guilty about hanging out with friends on a Saturday night.
You don’t have to blow a fortune to have fun.
Getting bottle service to impress drunk girls is a waste of time and money. Stop doing that right now. Read up on how to be more interesting and work on your speaking skills.
You don’t have to blow your savings. You can have fun without spending your retirement fund.
Pick your battles.
I believe in making my social events always worth it. You obviously can’t go out and be the life of the party every night of the week.
Here’s what I think about before I go out:
- Will this lead to a fun story?
- Do I actually like this social circle?
Pick your battles and know when it’s worth going out. When you do go out, there’s no need to feel guilty about letting a loose.
You can join groups and attend random events.
Once again, nobody’s suggesting that you get bottle service three times a week. There’s so much excitement happening out there right now that it’s a shame to miss out. There are all kinds of random events and group gatherings happening. Find like-minded people to be around more often.
The whole point of the article boils down to this: you’ll find more success in life by socializing with people instead of isolating yourself in your room.
There’s a big difference between staying in to focus on your goals and staying in because you weren’t invited anywhere. I had to write this article because I don’t want you to feel guilty about having some fun. While we’re at it, stop acting like a productivity robot. You have time to see your friends. It’s not the end of the world.
“Your network is your destiny, a reality backed up by many studies in the newly emergent fields of social networking and social contagion theory. We are the people we interact with.” — Keith Ferrazzi
Freedom to spend doesn’t mean you should or will spend all those additional dollars. It means you’ve got enough cash to do so without putting your financial future at risk. If you…strive to achieve a net worth that qualifies you not only as independent but also financially free, you must decide how you will use those additional dollars.
Agreed. It’s important to work on putting yourself in a situation where you can enjoy your life without stressing out over it.