“Your partner is a wrestler? That’s such a crazy thing to do!”
This is the most common reply that I receive when someone asks me about what my boyfriend does. Then the person usually isn’t sure where to take the conversation.
In case you’re in a similar situation, I wanted to write an article on how you can support a partner with a crazy passion.
Most of my friends will tell me about how their partner plays sports and then goes to the bar with their friends.
I respond with:
“Well mine dresses up in costumes and fake fights. He’s a professional wrestler.”
This conversation repeats itself at almost all social events during the initial get-to-know-you chit-chat with fellow attendees. Despite the initial confusion as to what I’m talking about, it almost always winds up with the person thinking that wrestling is totally cool and my life as a WAG (wives and girlfriends of athletes) is totally glamorous and identical to that of a Real Housewife.
Before I go on, I should explain exactly what this fake fighting scenario is that takes up a quarter of my partners heart (I occupy three-quarters, of course).
Basically, he does WWE style wrestling at various venues across both Australia and Canada with the dream of making it to the WWE.
Now I’m sure in your head, you’re thinking of one thing:
“Aren’t the results predetermined?”
The answer is yes, but at the risk of him breaking up with me, I must explain that it takes sheer athleticism and skill to do this and not any Tom, Dick or Harry can become a professional wrestler.
I love that my partner is different and has out there dreams but it hasn’t always been that way. Initially I thought it was kind of weird to be honest. Now I know that was just a lack of understanding. This lack of knowledge also paired with not really having any of my own dreams and passions to relate to the level of drive for a goal.
I’m genuinely so thankful that I’m not with someone who is just your run of the mills type character, repeating the same activities for the most part of their lives. Not only has it made me do things that I know I never would have by myself, I love seeing people I care about reach for their dreams (super corny, I know!)
I’m going to do a simple survival list for those of you dating/living with/sharing a cat with someone with unique dreams.
1: Fake it till you make it!
So your potential new partner has just told you about their dreams of becoming an Olympic Diver. You’re absolutely beaming with happiness that they’ve opened up to you, but deep down you’re hoping that they can’t pick up the clueless expression on your face, right?
Trust me, if you present yourself with confidence, it will beam right back. Aside from this, the sheer fact that you’re showing an interest will work wonders for your pending relationship, as well as remind them that their dreams and ambitions, no matter how crazy they may be, are important.
I still remember the initial stages of getting to know my partner. I mean, I had seen him around town, and knew that he was a wrestler, but never having predicted that we would end up together. I didn’t really have any need or desire to know anymore than that.
On our first coffee date, I was crossing all of my fingers and toes that he didn’t bring it up because I knew nothing; absolutely zero and I didn’t want to look clueless in front of him. Of course after the initial first date small talk and chatter about the menu, the topic came up.
I still pat myself on the back for the confidence mixed with little white lies that I span to make him think I had any clue about what he was doing; “Oh yeah, I love wrestling, I always watched it as a kid.”
(Disclaimer: My parents NEVER allowed us to watch wrestling).
Now looking back, I don’t really know if he believed that I knew what I was talking about, considering he’s basically a walking wrestling encyclopaedia, but whatever I said did the trick and he’s still putting up with me three years later.
2: Research their dreams and take an interest.
Who wants to be with someone who couldn’t give a flying hoot about their passions? Not me! Your partner is into bird watching, specifically the Canadian goose and hopes to make a living out of it?! That’s super cool, dude! Read the Wikipedia page on this.
The greatest thing about doing research is seeing your partner’s face of both sheer shock and love when you hit them with the facts that you have taken the time to learn. I mean, I just knew my partner loved the absolute hell out of me when I hit him with the fact that WWE Wrestler Chris Jericho beat fellow wrestlers Stone Cold Steve Austin and The Rock in the one night!
Another super cool thing following you research is that you may even see that you actually have an interest in their dreams too. I have a friend who had never been on a bike in her life, next thing you know she’s dating a professional cyclist and is basically training for the Tour de’ France!
3: Attend as many events as you can with them.
So it’s cocktail night with the girls and you absolutely can’t miss it, right?! Wrong! Be there and support your partner in crime! I mean honestly, I know the idea of going to an all age’s chess event and cheering on your partner doesn’t sound all that thrilling, but it’s a must.
I’ve personally attended many wrestling events in towns that I can’t even remember the name of, just to support my partner.
If I’m completely honest, there is definitely parts of it that I don’t really enjoy such as sitting by myself, or even having to sell his merchandise plastered with pictures of him, but when it comes down to it, I definitely wouldn’t trade it.
Seeing him look for me in the crowd, and give me a little smile, makes it all worth it. As sappy as it sounds, I know that I mean something to him and it makes him happy to see me there, supporting him.
4: Be there even when their dreams crumble down in front of them.
As much as we would all love to live in the perfect world where everyone’s dreams come true, unfortunately this isn’t always the case.
It seems to always go this way:
Things are going great until they’re not! All of a sudden you fail your entrance exam, get replaced by another violin player in the band or miss out on being recruited to a higher level sporting opportunity.
Following this sudden set back, your partner will most likely have that ever so familiar human instinct to run, throw it all away and cry alone in a corner; you must avail. Remind them that they can do this; make a sign filled with glitter and stand outside their work, write it in the sky, hire a singing gorilla to serenade them with wisdom; anything!
There has definitely been time’s in my partners wrestling dreams, where he has doubted himself. Most recently, he had a WWE try out and unfortunately it wasn’t his time. Reacting in the same way that any human would after just missing out on their dream, he was devastated and disappointed in his efforts.
Now not to toot my own horn and to make this story totally clichéd, but I was there, reminding him of all the great things about his achievements. I think I reminded him about one hundred times that the fact in itself that he even got a try out is something to be proud of and that not many other people are lucky enough to be given the opportunity.
Following giving your partner this gentle reminder of their greatness, you then have to give a bit of tough love. Be strict on them, no skipping workouts, lessons, or readings just because they are a little bit down in the dumps! Be on their backs, girlfriend! They will thank you later, I promise.
When it comes down to it, supporting someone who you care about to work towards their dreams is so rewarding. Not only do you get to share with them the joy, seeing the ambition and drive in them may also help you to better yourself.
Let me know in the comments of any crazy passions and dreams that your partners have!